Alright ladies, pull up an extra chair next to your computer and call your husband over. Tell him that you can finally explain how cloth diapers work. Who knows, maybe you'll even be able to convince him that changing diapers is fun because of this revolutionary way to explain diapers and how they work.
Or better yet, once he comes over you can tell him that you finally understand what each position on a defensive line does. That may really get his juices moving! ;-) You see, with this chart I have easily explained to the football illiterate what a defensive line is and does and to the diaper illiterate what all of the components of a diaper do.
This is just in time for football too, I watched my first Bears game of the season last night....although I did lose interest pretty quickly because it is pre-season. For those of you that don't know....these games don't really mean anything. It was strange to see Peyton Manning in a Bronco's Jersey...!
Back to the game changing chart I have come up with. With the exception of the 2 Safety Positions, this chart is pretty accurate in my mind. Why? Good question! Most of the time you don't double up on the doubler (you don't typically have 2 doublers in a diaper - but you always want 2 Safety's in football), but you never know...I have a heavy wetter and have been know to triple up the soaker pads.
Here's a breakdown of the positions/features starting from the Middle Linebacker/Soaker Pad:
- Middle Linebacker / Soaker Pad
- Middle Linebacker
- commonly leads the team in tackles
- leader of the defense - without him, defense fails
- Soaker Pad
- commonly leads all of the diaper components in absorption
- catches almost all liquid - without it, diaper fails
- Tackle / Soft Inner Lining
- Tackle
- Makes sure the ball carrier doesn't get up field
- Soft Inner Lining
- Makes sure solid waste stays put
- Defensive End / Leg Gusset
- Defensive End
- Makes sure that the ball carrier stays within the defense
- Leg Gusset
- Makes sure that the solid and liquid waste stays inside the diaper
- Outside Linebacker / Velcro or Snap Closure
- Outside Linebacker
- Outside containment - keeps everyone contained where they need to be
- Velcro or Snap Closure
- Outside Containment - Keeps all components contained where they need to be
- Cornerback / Waterproof Outer Lining
- Cornerback
- Defend against the pass
- Waterproof Outer Lining
- Defend diaper against leaking
- Safety / Doubler
- Safety
- Last line of defense in a play, if a play gets away from defense
- Douber
- Last line of defense in a diaper, if a diaper gets too full
There you have it. I hope this helps my fellow gender understand just a little bit more about how a diaper works and why they are so intricate. AND I hope I have helped the female gender understand just a little bit more about how a defensive line works in football.
I have done a great service to the world with this, I know it and my ego is getting bigger by the minute! Seriously though, if you have questions, comments, editions, or subtractions to this please let me know. I love hearing from you.
Please don't forget to follow me on Twitter @DiaperingDaddy and "Like" me on Facebook, just search for The Diapering Dad.
Thanks for reading....stay tuned!
Dan - The Diapering Daddy
